1. I turn dirty diapers into a basketball game.
2. I can't take your mommy seriously with her boobs hanging out.
3. I use the car like an expensive rocker when all else fails.
4. I have fed you in a football like position, tucked underneath my arm to the side.
5. I lessen my baby chores by leaving the same bib on you, day in and day out.
6. I will go as far as agreeing with the phrase 'women are always right' just to avoid the graveyard shift.
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